must everyday be of so much fuck ups?

HA, today that bitch wasn't in school today. =D =D
someone took over her place.
well, LADIES and GENTLEMEN was his favorite quote.
maybe a little clapping of hands will it more grand.

here's what i will say to him.

"You know what Sir, I find you way better than the female botox crazy attitude bitch.
Reason being you are friendly, jokeful and at times gay.
BUT if you were to repeat your LADIES and GENTLEMEN, I will be damn fucking angry,
I will tear those few strands of hair on your head and pop you in your fucking nuts. If you wanna clap, I will place your head in between your hands and make you clap. Thank You."

damn polite already lor. =D
you wont want to hear what i would want to say to female bitch. =x

i am going to miss my classmates in class. sorry about me not being free for class outings...

ANYWAY, was talking to samantha.
oh well, fyi while you were telling me all about him..
he treating you nice and stuff...
i felt both side. i felt happy.
AND I FELT FUCKING FUCKING PAIN.
PAIN IN MY GODDAMN HEART.
i think if this torture continue i will just die for goodness sake.

I wish you all the best.
Go and get him, make sure he treats you well,
make sure you treasure him.
make sure you love him.
MAKE THE FUCKING SURE HISTORY DONT REPEAT.
because i dont think anyone will wanna be in my place.

btw, here's a few pics that when I view them,
it fucking hurts.

hmmm above pic the last time we went out.

She at my hse.. those times...

how sweet were these kisses, i miss them.

in mac at bukit gombak. ice cream memories...

how pretty you look... i miss you.

anyway, i dont think you will give a fuck now.
i cried when i typed the captions for us.
it fucking hurts alright?

all the best for you and shrawn or whoever...
but memories can be revived. its up to your choice.

If I Were A Boy
Beyonce Knowles

If I were a boy
Even just for a day
I’d roll outta bed in the morning
And throw on what I wanted then go
Drink beer with the guys
And chase after girls
I’d kick it with who I wanted
And I’d never get confronted for it.
Cause they’d stick up for me.

[Chorus]
If I were a boy
I think I could understand
How it feels to love a girl
I swear I’d be a better man.
I’d listen to her
Cause I know how it hurts
When you lose the one you wanted
Cause he’s taken you for granted
And everything you had got destroyed

If I were a boy
I would turn off my phone
Tell everyone it’s broken
So they’d think that I was sleepin’ alone
I’d put myself first
And make the rules as I go
Cause I know that she’d be faithful
Waitin’ for me to come home (to come home)

(Chorus)
If I were a boy
I think I could understand
How it feels to love a girl
I swear I’d be a better man.
I’d listen to her
Cause I know how it hurts
When you lose the one you wanted
Cause he’s taken you for granted
And everything you had got destroyed

It’s a little too late for you to come back
Say its just a mistake
Think I’d forgive you like that
If you thought I would wait for you
You thought wrong

But you’re just a boy
You don’t understand (Yeah you don’t understand)
How it feels to love a girl someday
You wish you were a better man
You don’t listen to her
You don’t care how it hurts
Until you lose the one you wanted
Cause you’ve taken her for granted
And everything you have got destroyed
But you’re just a boy

shugs girl i miss you so much. regretted for letting it all go.

Mis-adventure.

Alright lemme recall what have happen recently...
WARNING: Post might be explict due to the fuck fact that what happen recently.

• my broke up with samantha.

• family outing at east coast park.

• w35q

• upcoming trips.

So here's whats thats going on. first up, my broke up with samantha. yea i knw it seems nearly impossible that we will come to an end. but well, it happened. for good for bad, who the fuck gives a shit now. anyway, i still dont get the point when you quote the blog post i posted on msn and gimme a >.<". i mean, if you are upset abt me leaving you, den why not patch? all this fucking while i have been requestin for one and there the fuck you are knwing i will patch back and still making yourself so upset. i dunno why, once i see our pics taken in the past, it hurts my goddamn heart. perhaps it was the memories that were left behind? guess i should learn to let the fuck go. argh its hard but fuck it. its over.




so, yesterday was suppose to be a festive season where all the muslims have their prayers. oh well, happy selamat hari raya to my malay friends! guess where the fuck was i? i was at ecp camping with my family members. started well pretty good. brought 4 bikes out of 6 down. 1 colnago, 1 wheeler, 1 bmx and 1 sissy ass bike. loaded up into a massive lorry and was heading down to ecp. reached there approx 2pm. wtf the place flooded with people. setup the tent as usual while all e aunties preparing the food...

after setting up, i went for a coastal ride. it was freaking windy as if some shithead forgotton to turn off the fan and i am in the wind tunnel struggling. man, the results show on the speedometer was fucking disgraceful to reveal. 24 mins for a 11km ride? disappointing. perhaps it was the coastal wind and the massive amount of people that were using the path.

soon it was dark and late and my cousins and i were having dinner. food was great. beehoon and fried rice accompany with curry chicken. desserts were cold longan with almond pudding. woah it was good. i took a nap in e small tent as the rest went doing their stuff...

soon, it was 12midnight. clement and i was chilling out by the beach. the lights that were shining off the ships were beautiful. however, lighting was what that made me shook my head. predicting a storm will approach, we zipped up our tent and slept. at 4am, it came. small drizzle with drips of water woke me and clement up. however we managed to still slp.

until i got so fucking irritated by the water dripping, i woke up. thought of evac to the next tent but was nearly impossible because the huge tent was collapsing already. wtf. thus, all of us evac to the shelter ahead. things got worse when i can see my uncle's tent being uprooted almost flying away. that was how strong the fucking wind was. at the shelter, my colnago bike was blown almost to topple, thank goodness it was lock on with my bro's wheeler. all is wet and cold. being one of the man of the family, i have to stand up and shield the rain cover from the wind. it was one hell of an experience. lesson learnt, never to camp during a monsoon season. MON-FUCKING-SOON.




wtf it is like a few more weeks to the end of my sem 2 and to tell u guys, frm the bottom of my heart, you guys rock seriously. i knw i am fucking FUCKING FUCKING irritating and always joking around disturbing people but i am doing this just for fun no motives at all. never was i once wanting to create a conflict. i am so going to miss you guys when we change class next sem. lets plan for one sunday, all of us head down to sentosa for a day of fun. or maybe ecp camping! hahahaha. anyway, looking forward for it too!




trekearth is heading to a waterfall pretty soon and i cant wait to go lah! its like every trip is a test and a reward. the test, is to bring us out of the comfort zone and push our physically body to the next level. the reward, is all of our months of training. seeing it come to work is more than just a reward. its the experience. AND yes, climbing a mountain or waterfall to me is another achievement. hmmm, being good in IT and able to experience nature with a healthy body? isnt it best of 3 worlds? hahaha. damn looking forward to 10 weeks holiday! woah being able to climn 4Gs in one shot is a challenge. but i am up to it.

okay, its like 4.30am and i am posting this post, with a damn irritating sore throat, a sprained right arm and a 3cm cut on my toe. wtf and i am going to rockclimb soon. fuck.

okay, j, here's a post for you. i miss you truckloads. pls call or sms or leave an offline msg on msn or anything? if you are overseas, take good care of yourself.. (:

what happened?

Hey, i knw its been some time since i even blogged. -.- well, so far, quite a lot of things had happen so far. hahaha. just like the stock market, there were ups and downs. i would say through what i have been through so far, i had realised that there are many really good friends that will stay beside me even when i am down despite the fact that i am known as fuckface. hahaha. anyway, first up,

PELAPAH WATERFALL!

phew wee, first, thank God almighty that all was safe and not even a single major injury happened. thank God for the weather and also the anointing He had given to Kim and Jerral. me, being their fuckface was er... i can say that its my pleasure to bring you guys fun! hahahaha. the waterfall was sastifying and great. water was cold and i did manage to make a jump! hahaha how cool. it was really a pity that quite a number of my ig members didn't came. otherwise i am sure they will enjoy it. nxt year! if possible. =x I knw kim wont want to go back. hahahaha.

Edward and Samantha...

when aaron heard the news that we stopped all our communication, he went shock saying that he didnt expect things to happen so badly between us. anyway, i guess i should give her some time to really be single and independant. i really hope that throughout these months that we had spend thick and thin together, you should have learn quite alot of things from me. do use them alright? if you are wanting to know, i am doing alright. is just that i am lonely everytime the sunsets. perhaps i am not used to it now. sorry for such a huge blow in your life.

Friends...

thanks masturina, for being my hearing ear. hahaha, rmb i always said. there are always two sides to a coin. if i can be very hyper, so can i be emo. hahaha but thanks, what you said encouraged me alot. a few buddies i would like to thank, sebastian, my lil bro clinton, aaron, ariel and mas and also the friends that accompanied me. hahaha!

Asia Conference is coming up so crazily sooooooon!!!! woah, me is excited. hahaha, today i served in water bap. sometimes ar, i am not only a fuckface, i am also a dumbfuck. i think almost anyword related to fuck have something to do with me except for motherfucker. lol!!! anyway, ppl used their toes to pick up the fallen tag in the pool, i dived. LOL! whole body was crazily wet and looks stupid huh! LOL! cant wait for asia conference! :D:D

binary and binary.. sounds like binding my ass.

anyway, today in sch was not bad. i was early! :D hope can be early for the week man. i miss those days where my grades were soaring. but who cares abt grades? my classmates are much more than the grades i obtained. really had a great time with them despite the fact that saddam loves to throw sarcasm at me... and many more. but, who cares? hahaha. in fact they are the funniest ppl around.

sorry guys. i wanted to play soccer today with you guys but didnt expect you guys to leave half way during class. man, i can let my today grades fall any deeper otherwise i am literrally screwed. but you know what? they came back. -.- hahahha. besides, i am not feeling very well dont know because of the f up weather or what. perhaps i am just pure tired. well, before 9 pm, my beloved brother ariel showed me something so bad, i almost puke.

rain chung. dunno what in the earth is wrong with this guy. his a f up gual. GUAL comes from guy and gal. damn, his pics is so horrid, that upon gazing, u will lose any hunger appetite or any mood to do anything. my God why have such creation like this. this GUAL wears almost anything, and is damn revealing on his flesh. sHe doesnt have any shame does he? woah, i almost puke seriously.

saw this "mini" pasam malam at sch area. my friends bought patrick for their handphone and all of a sudden, a thought came to my mind that my girl just got herself a new bag. so i bought her spongebob square pants! i hope she like it. :D and also bought her a HUGE box of choco baby. hope she enjoys!

reached home damn shag!! watch ironman and less than 15 mins, i shut the whole thing down.. and went to bed. super tired. and i woke up at 2am. crazy am i? hahaha but who cares. sebas and aaron were dead asleep already. so i went to supper myself. how sad huh! and had sliced fish soup and a cup of cold milo. woah, how rewarding :D!

came home and game for a while.... and now here i am, 4.44am posting this blog. nights, everybody.... i mean morning...! crap, UT is like in 5 hours time. aiyah think i can de! haha... oh and trekearth training is today! woots! lookin forward to it! :D aidios!~

what a kick start, what an ending.

hey. today woke up or rather i didnt slp. had insomnia i think. just cant freakin slp. its like me turning from left to right frm 6.40am to what... 10am? man, i kinda of feel bad. Naresh called me reminding me to go CG and i was still not going. i mean, what for should i go when i didnt even manage to have a goood rest and ltr slp in mikki's CG? i dont want to leave a bad impression. so might as well dont go!

awaken and blur, i stumbled into the hall with my dad screwing me up with his words abt me not clearing up the furniture and stuff. he was like some big ass shot man seating, drinking coffee and reading his papers at the same time nagging his mouth off me. woah, whats worst? my mom added gunpowder into the fire and i nearly had a fight. what a start in the morning right? well, just like a sports car, in order to go fast need to have ignition right? that was mine ignition. what an explosive one.

anyway, me in my underwear started moving all the furniture away from the tv console. a major disccusion with my parents to where we should move what and what we should do. looks like we have great co-ordination. but still, minor argument arises when we misunderstood the positions of the furnitures. here's a funny part. being in a family that doesn't have Christ makes it a huge challenge to talk about crappy feng shui and this and that... what cai sheng ye... lol. so my dad was like saying there are this two botak smiling idols carrying a bag of coins which my dad wanted me to shift. he was like, these two idols are good. because their size is small and they weigh very heavy, meaning that the spiritual strength inside it is strong. first that came to my mind was... what crap. lol, sorry to offend all but me being me only believe in the truth, God. my dad revealed some creepy stuff too about his idols and all and i dont really care that much. lol.

hmmmm. suppose to go down to riverwalk to support my girl for her audition but i was late and missed it all. shift all the furnitures by 3.30pm and hurried out of house to clark quay. i accompanied her and some of the cg members to "shop" around. i dunno whatsup with my gf but me was pretty irritated with what she said. girl gave me that, why you keep on following me look. was pissed and thought. wth, then who else you expect me to cling onto? of cos is you la. anyway, thinking through, its not worth a single shit to go and be so uber upset over such a trivia stuff. me, being ahem, a gentleman approached my girl and thank cupid or whosoever, everything was back to normal. chill out there for awhile, and finally, girl and i went to my house for dinner.

dinner was kinda of simple but yet, delicious. of cos lah, prepared by my mother leh, 2nd best cook. first is my grandma, her mum. anyway, we had vege.. abc soup.. chicken drumstick roasted.. egg.. and watermelon! woah, damn uber full. after that went for a nap with girl. hahaha...

send her home at around 9.30pm made it back here just on time to type this kick ass day.

oh yes, tml is my class soccer. i am prepared to get kick in the ass my saddam and supreme. screwed.

sigh, sorry for not being accountable enough. i am not feeling well today myself too, thanks for letting me be myself. and, heard you are sick too. take care cgl and hope God bless your week.

er... bro, things do happen lah. but sometimes we must seat down and think over whether is it worth the fight or is it worth to tahan. perhaps its all a misunderstanding between you and her. why bother? hahahaa... anything, text me bro.

long time nvr blog. but who wanna read a joker's life?

darn, this few days i have been slpping at 6. am i crazy? i doubt. anyway, life now is rather in quite a complete mess in my studies. getting Cs & Ds are common for a joker in school i guess. perhaps its time for me to pull myself together and get serious just like ariel my buddy.

first and foremost, God. darn, its been a long time since i cry out to God about my life. looking back i reflect. its kinda of mess up. everytime when someone mention abt quiet time. crap, i feel guilty. i feel as if i have left my God outside the door not inviting him into the parties of my life. sorry God. guess human's nature is to seek you when i am in need. i want to change and i will change. will i? let time decides.

second! my girl. hey darling samantha, i am kinda of sure u must be reading this blog with eyes going O_O. hahaha, anyway, i really miss you alot. everytime when i see couples hugging on the mrt, walking hand in hand strolling down the streets, i felt the sense of loniness in my heart. "girl where are you? i ponder..." well, i really hope we can last a lifetime of love. having you be mine forever is a gift from heaven and living with you in this lifetime is a blessing. your birthday is very near. sorry i cant give you what i really promised. but me will do me best to make you the luckiest and most beloved girl on the planet on 16 Oct 2008. <3

third! my family. woah piang eh, ppl place their family after God and i placed it after my gf. perhaps its different people way of placing the important values in their life after all. well, dad is down with a fractured leg. i teared the other day while waiting for samantha to finish working. i was listening to Parachute band singing to surrender all. what make me tear is that i feel that i have not spend enough time with him. as i am typing this, pictures of memory of my daddy taking care of me when i was young flash back. how he took care of me when i was young. i felt the sense of security when he came to fetch me back from kindergarden. those time when he sacriface his time to send me to school, those time i made him angry.. those time i upset him so bad, he was hurt inside. damn, he's the best dad ever. yes he have many flaws as a father. but which father will work manually just to pay off his son's debt of 300 over bucks to Singtel? which father will have his leg fractured and still work and place 20 bucks into your wallet? which dad will aid a son when he's in trouble during secondary one? my dad. (: now his leg is fking fractured. damn that son of a bitch that made he fell. seeing him limping aches my heart. what the hell son am i? i ponder. dad, if u are reading this, i am sorry for times i made u upset and hurt. perhaps before you leave this world, i want you to carry my child and take good care of them. most importantly, come back to Christ. i want you and mum in heaven.

fourth, ministry. wooo, today or rather yesterday i did Radar position. it's a position that really makes me sleep. but i want to be stronger and be able to rise up in the next level. things happened today. but i will learn and be submissive towards whats coming my way. discipleship.

fifth! my brothers. yes yes, aaron and sebastian. damn, u guys are really the best buddies i should say, yes we have been through crazy arguments and damn, i cant remember. why place all the shit in the toilet bowl and stink up the whole toilet? flush it all lah. yea, thanks for being there for me to hear abt my f-ed up life and thanks too, for advicing me. well guys, i hope you two will forget abt the past and we can of cos start anew.

Oh yes, my blood brother. not that i am placing him last. but he's my BLOOOOOOD BROTHER. damn, sometimes i hate you so much. but u know, i love you way much i hate you. i know you just gotten your punk asss wheeler bike. here's something for you. everytime you cycle, it worries my heart. why? reason being i know hw crazily we cycle when we are together. i cant afford to lose you, is not like mum and dad can bring up another kid? bro, i need you as much as you need me in the future. i will raise you up when all have fallen and i will be there to lead you. last but not least, i love you.

Oh and TREK EARTH!
man, shit have really happened and i hope its all over. anyway, i really hope to see as many trekkers back into this IG for the pelapah waterfall trip. honestly, the trip is really a trip that is fun and i am sure you will enjoy it. i went for the racee and fell in love with it already. the experiences was priceless and beyond words. i hope that all of us will strengthened our friendship throughout this trip between the year 1s and year 2s. look at it this way, if we are going to have this cold friendship, it wont help us to handle next year's batch, wont be able to continue Trek Earth anymore. hey jerral and kim! thanks for all the effort put into Trek Earth! its been a pleasure working with you guys.

OKAY, edward is going crazy. why? because its 6am. CG is in 5 hours and i am still awake. one word. "screwed." anyway, thanks for reading! or rather wasting your time here. hahahaa...